Have you ever imagined yourself as the star of your own movie?
I’m not sure where my penchant for being the dramatic lead of my own life kicked in. Perhaps it was when, as a child, I tried to spice up mundane chores by making up ridiculous situations that depended on me successfully completing the job, i.e.; telling myself the house would explode if I didn’t finish vacuuming in 30 seconds. Silly I know, but it made it more interesting. That kind of imagination is useful at times.
But when it comes to everyday life, sometimes things aren’t so epic. And it’s actually not great that I want them to be.
Because I’m casting myself as a main character in the movie of my life, I obviously want everything to look good for the star. I put undue pressure on myself when I fumble, forget my lines, and generally act like the newbie on the set of my circumstances. Included in that analogy is the imaginary audience watching the movie unfold. In my mind, there’s a gallery of onlookers and critics judging my performance and ready to rate my decisions as worthy of applause, or as a rotten tomato on that popular movie rating site.
All that to say, I’ve realized I’m probably taking myself too seriously much of the time. That starring role? Only I think of myself that way. And the audience? Well, there is hardly anyone watching.
Most people are like me – in their own heads, not spending precious time evaluating others. To them, I’m what I’ve heard a sportscaster refer to as a JAG – ‘just another guy’. Yes, I know there was a TV show named JAG. I’m certainly not talking about Judge Advocate Generals in the military.
The term was being applied to a quarterback of an NFL team that the sports anchor was unimpressed by. His label of “just another guy’ was his way of letting us know that anyone with a bare minimum of athletic talent could replace that player at the position, and get pretty much the same results.
(Funny how every opinionated person in the media gets to call other people ‘replaceable’, when in fact each one of them is also pretty expendable themselves. But that’s beside the point.)
The term JAG stuck in my head, not because it represented an insult to someone’s ability, but actually provided a benefit of sorts. You see, if I am ‘just another guy’, I’m also granted the freedom of anonymity. When no one is really concerned about my performance, my options are wide open. I’m invisible to the masses but able to make major changes and decisions without worrying about major consequences. I’m just another guy.
This doesn’t mean that I’m devaluing myself. I realize that I’m created as a unique individual. But I’m not the star of the show. I can let myself off the hook and dismiss the imaginary audience that is putting thumbs up or thumbs down over every decision I make. I can simply focus on the happiness of three of the biggest connections of my life – God, my family, and myself. If those three are happy, then I’m good.
That’s not the only way JAG can be used, if you really think about it.
As a Christ-follower, I realize that I’m also Justified, Anointed, and Gifted.
So while I’m just another guy, I’m simultaneously much more to The One who made me.
And that’s just enough.
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